Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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