Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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