Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
