Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize
