sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
