gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Text me some of your sweat
Nobody cheats on THIS.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
