I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize