its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Randomize
