i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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