what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
