Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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