capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Randomize
