I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.