discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.