She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Randomize
