it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
