is your mom at the bar?
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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