Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
