You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
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