her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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