do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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