So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
