okay pat passed out under dana's car
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
this is an emotional support booty call
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
