Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
