just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
this will be a night to untag.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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