I am in a vortex of obligation.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
What happened to fro yo and sex?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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