I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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