Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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