why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
