none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
never play flip cup with pint glasses
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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