i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Randomize
