I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Randomize
