I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
