Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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