Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
29 “I’m Getting Old” Moments
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
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