I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
