i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
im drinking this country out of the recession.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!