I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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