Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
