You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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