Buhtt sex?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize