**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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