Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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