since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
my poor anus
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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