he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
