There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize