are you still at the devil's house?
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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