Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about my life...
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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