Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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