Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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