i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
