she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
